Diary of a Facebook Addict

I decided to deactivate my account for a few days. Everything about it was just getting to me way more than it really should have. You know how it is, some days your news feed is boring and other days friends will post something that makes you want to roll your eyes or slap them across the back of the head Leroy Jethro Gibbs style… or maybe throw a full on tantrum at them. But all that (aside from the eye rolling) is a no no for me as I am traditionally more of the passive aggressive type who vents privately or through the use of sarcasm and facial expressions (I don’t even want to think about the kind of lines I’m going to get as I get older hopefully more ‘laughter lines’ than sarcasm ones). So, I realised maybe it was time to take a FB detox. How hard could it be?

Day 1

So far so good. I’ve deactivated my account, reassured Facebook that it wasn’t them  it was me and that I will be back some time in the near future (jeesh they’re clingy, aren’t they?) and uninstalled the app on my phone to take away the temptation of convenience. I’ve left Messenger on my phone though… not sure if that needs to be uninstalled… I did get a message from the app advising I was logged out and to log back in (damn it, programs! Let me leave without all the follow up nonsense would you?) so I think it still counts as a severed connection to FB. Right? Right?! *goes to get a coffee*

Calm down, Tara. I am not going to over think this. This will be good for me. There is more to life than Facebook. If my close friends need me they have my number. I think. Maybe. Well I’m pretty sure they do. Besides, I’ve got my Instagram to act as a FB withdrawal patch so they can always find me there or on Twitter if they think to look for me there. I’m not a complete social media hermit. It will be fine. I can do this. It’s just one account. No big deal. *deep breaths*

Day 2

It was weird not checking FB before bed (or randomly at 2am just because) but it was fine. Should I be a bit sad that my friends haven’t noticed I’m MIA on their chat list or news feed? Probably not. It’s only day two and I did deactivate in the afternoon of day one. They have their own lives. Plus they have countless pics of kids, pets and food to focus on. And selfies. Can’t forget the selfies. And check ins. And political rants. And trolls to deal with (damn, keyboard warriors). Wouldn’t want to interrupt all that. It’s too important. I don’t need a text or a phone call or a catch up. It’s fine. I like my own company anyway.

Thank you Instagram and Twitter. You’ve given me a place to go to when the FB muscle memory kicks in (and when boredom hits). You don’t annoy me yet, so you guys can stay. Congrats. I’ve also opened Messenger out of pure curiosity and I’m signed out with no contacts showing due to no FB connection. So Messenger, you can stay. Well done. Wow, I feel like I am having my own app version of Survivor going on. How random.

Day 3

Turns out when you take away my Facebook I obsessively latch onto Instagram. Huh.  Hardly seems like a detox if I’m supplementing Facebook with another app. Why am I doing this again?

My cousin noticed my profile was gone and she sent me a text. Naaaaaaw thanks cuz. I feel loved. Best. Cousin. Ever.

***

The guilts have set in. I haven’t sent a generic birthday message in three days. I haven’t scrolled past a meme or clicked the like button to acknowledge a status or photo. How will my FB peeps know they matter? What if it’s not really me being neglected by my friends but me withdrawing from them?

 Day 4

I’ve started to think about Facebook less often.  Funnily enough I have heard from three friends today. Only one of which noticed I had disappeared from Facebook. She was surprised and a little impressed (she’s a Facebook addict too). I am feeling better about this.  I’ve still been checking Instagram and Twitter but the obsessiveness has died down.

Day 5

That can’t be right. Day five? Already? Wow. Go me. I’ve got this. I know I said “a few days” but why not keep it going? It helps when you have things to do to keep your mind distracted.

Day 6

Facebook? What’s that again?

Day 7

Detox is over. I had Facebook automatically set it to seven days before reactivation (thinking that I would come back sooner).

What have I learnt? You can quietly disappear for a week from social media and not many people will notice or care. Also, it’s completely random with just how much you will miss out on during that time. Sometimes you will miss a lot of important events and other times it will be a slow week and you’ll be able to catch up quickly. I have also realised just how dependent I have become on my friendships being validated and maintained through Facebook. And just how much my own self worth is tied into it. How did I let that happen?

My verdict? I am sticking with Facebook as it does connect me with friends overseas and friends I don’t get to see often but I will be keeping it off my phone for the time being. Which of course means I won’t be checking it as often.

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