Dear Brain,

I think it’s great that you have a lot of excess energy and enthusiasm to keep going around and around on this bizzare merry-go-round of random crap thoughts. Really, it’s great. One teeny tiny problem though… it’s sleep time here in Tara Land. So how about switching off or powering down for now?

Yours sincerely,


Dear Tara,

How about no?

Love and kisses,


P.S. Thanks for the note. Super sweet of you. Does this make us pen pals?! *excited squeal* *mental happy dance*


Dear Brain,

What? Seriously. Knock it off already. I have stuff to do tomorrow. Technically today. Damn it. I don’t want to think about a million really obscure things (like where or how flies sleep or what it would be like to be a trapeze artist or a spy or a stunt car driver or to be stuck in a lift with Keanu Reeves…), I don’t want songs to pop in my head (especially Disney, thank you very much!) and I most certainly do not want to philosophize about falling asleep or keep obsessing about what time it is. Got that? Let me sleep and you can catch me up on your ponderings later. The key word being later. L-A-T-E-R. Later.

I promise I will feed you coffee when I wake up. And I will give you free reign to wander as far as you like. Go nuts. I don’t care. I. Don’t. Care. Just please, please, please shut the F-Word up and go to SLEEEEP.

Yours annoyed,


P.S. We are not pen pals. We will never be pen pals. You don’t have a postal address you twit.


Dear Tara To that someone that I used to know, (song reference intended. Good luck getting that out of your head. Mwahahahaha)

Wow. That P.S. was really mean. I mean who ends a letter like that? Are you trying to channel Will from Will & Grace? Because that would be weird. Wow. Just wow. I also didn’t like your overall tone. Jeeez.  Cranky much? It’s just sleep. How boring is that? But hey, if you’re going to be like that…

*starts going through entire list of Disney songs kept in the memory files*

Good luck sleeping now, soul sister! Mwah!

Yours forever (haha!),

Brain…. “with Pinky, Pinky and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain” (sorry got distracted… oh the memories of that cartoon…).



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